*Note from Sarah. Here’s another great post by Jason Seib, helping all of us to reflect, and stay on track! Thank you Jason!
I hope by now most of you have come to understand that I write these posts because I want to help you, and when my tone sometimes sounds a little harsh it’s because I truly believe a clear and concise point that needs to be made. This might be one of those posts.
Occasionally people pull me aside, call me, and email me to ask why this paleo and exercise thing isn’t working. Please understand that I don’t always have all the answers, but there a few common problems that create these situations. Let’s go over them and see if we can save you some frustration.
The first of these common problems is denial. If you cheat every couple of days, you can not expect amazing results. You are also remiss if you are in denial over one thing, as if it isn’t cheating if you only overlook one specific cheat. If your diet is perfect except for that Starbucks Carmel Macchiato that you absolutely must suck down in order to make it to work in the morning, then you already know why you aren’t getting results. No matter how loud you cry, “I don’t like black coffee!”, you will never get your fat cells to feel sorry for you, and insulin will not take the morning off. Yes, I understand some things are REALLY hard to give up, but I can’t change biochemistry for you. If this is you, you just need to come to terms with the cold hard fact and stop trying to pretend that you will get the results you want as long as your intentions are good. I don’t mean to sound cold hearted – I definitely have my own temptations – but cheating is cheating.
The second common problem is a lack of information. You may be assuming you’re doing everything correctly when you haven’t really looked close enough at all the inputs. For example, when I get emails from people who swear they are in complete compliance with perfect paleo and not getting anywhere, the first thing I always do is ask for a 3 day food log, a list of all liquids consumed other than water, sleep patterns, workout schedule and type of exercise performed, perceived stress level, all medications including birth control, all supplements, and anything else they put in their mouth, even gum and mints. Most people never respond. If I do hear from them again, they usually explain that they weren’t quite as compliant as they thought they were. There’s always a chance that this could be you. Sit down and write out all the information I listed here and take a long hard look to see if there is something you have been missing. And remember, for all of human history except the last few hundred years exercise has been inextricably linked to eating, and therefore surviving. In my opinion, if you aren’t exercising in a manner befitting your species, you aren’t compliant.
The third problem is just simply a lack of knowledge and/or misinformation. One common example is eating out too often and not factoring in all the vegetable oils you are consuming. Or making the assumption that diet soda is fine because it doesn’t contain sugar. Or drinking fruit juice because it’s “all natural”. These situations imply that you still have some learning to do and you just need to find a little help or do a little research. A mistake is only made when you assume you are compliant without asking all the questions.
Now for some good news. There are solutions to all of these problems. If you are currently in denial, get your head right and face your demons head on. You absolutely have the power to overcome these flavor-related obstacles. Be aggressive and it won’t even take you very long to break these bad habits. If you think maybe you need more data about your situation, write everything down for a few days and see if there is anything you missed. I would venture to guess that most people would be surprised with what they find when they can see all the facts at once. If you just lack knowledge you simply need to not jump to anymore conclusions and get educated. The Paleo Solution by Robb Wolf will answer all your “why” questions.
Even more good news – this blog has evolved into a community of people who all have goals similar to yours and many of them may have already traversed the precarious stages in which you might now find yourself. Post your questions in the comments, just don’t ask anyone to recite Robb’s book for you from cover to cover.
Now go forth and succeed! (okay, that was a little cheesy. 
)
PDF
I just started Paleo on Monday, the 25th. I’m kind of surprised that I lost 4lbs because, while I have not cheated once and have had no temptation to do so, I’m eating way more fruit than the 1 serving that is recommended. In fact, I did not expect to lose any because of that but I’m happy to be wrong:) I’m sure I won’t keep up at this pace given that I’m chugging fruit at the rate I breathe air. I plan to gorge on fruit for the few remaining weeks of summer then it will naturally taper back to the 1-2 servings that are recommended for someone attempting weight loss.
My biggest reason for going Paleo wasn’t for weight loss, though I do have 15 lbs that I wouldn’t mind shedding, but to regulate my hormones. I have terrible acne, migraines, difficult menstrual cycles – the whole works. Already my skin has cleared and so far no migrains. Woo hoo! I’m very hopeful at this point but I think the true test will be in a month or two.
Love your book, love your site – Thanks so much!
I have to say that I totally agree with you about the acne, migraines, etc…since changing my lifestyle to paleo two months ago, my skin is clear and my headaches have subsided. Cramps have been lessened, period is regular…
Also, just a bit of friendly advice. As tempting as it is, cheating will hurt more than you think. I had a sandwich. A SANDWICH. It was all veggies, and wheat bread. It was the bread that did me in, and I’m sure the sauce that was on the veggies. Worst headache ever. Don’t even bother!
So, I’m certain I haven’t read enough, but I have a question. This is about the original post (by Sara), when she talks about eating being linked to exercise. I have a rare genetic disorder that makes my collagen (all of it) not work properly. The first time I had a joint dislocation was in the crib. (I swear my first memory is standing in front of the xray machine in my lemon sherbet yellow footed jammies) Exercise is dangerous for me ~ and it’s also all I’ve ever wanted to do. Run and jump and play. I do have benefit from properly eating paleo (4 weeks, 12 pounds, 3 inches, no exercise! ~ I love telling people that!).
Are there specific recommendations for those unable to exercise in ‘normal’ ways?
Wow, Grace, I’m not sure what to tell you. Without knowing more about you condition and having some face-to-face time with you, I don’t really know what you are capable of. I can tell you with confidence that some movement is better than none. If there are things you know you can do without hurting yourself (maybe walking, body weight movements?) then do them, but I would hate to recommend anything that might hurt you.
Thanks, Jason! Nice to just be heard. One knee (the ‘good’ one) has about 70% of its cartilage; and the other was destroyed in a car accident. So walking, even though I very much love it, is not my sport. I do have a rebounder, and as long as my back is not out of joint, I do that. I like the pool, but you couldn’t really call it swimming. Warm water pool is very good (and hard to get to), and they have an assistant and exercises to do with pool weights or noodles. [I learned swimming wasn't so great for me the first time I was in the warm water pool, and kicked, and promptly dislocated a knee.] Cardio is what I crave. Probably stationary bike would do that, and I’m approved for it, as it’s no impact.
Even if I never do find one that’s good for me, I’m so happy to find clean eating and a community to support it!
Hi there, rad site. I just started paleo two days ago and so far I’m totally in love with it! My wife (on a vegan diet) thinks it’s funny that I’m into it as much as I am. One of my questions is, would you consider tennis as a paleo-worthy exercise? I love playing 2 – 3 hours of tennis a few times per week – extremely rigorous play, lots of sprinting, side stepping, etc.
My next question is, how much is too much? For example, the other night I made a lamb shank stew and practically ate the entire thing! I used, carrots, onions, ghee, 2 fresh 100% organic lamb shanks, and chicken broth (and spices for taste) – it was delicious, so I ate it all. Is that bad?
Looking forward to your response!
Tennis is great exercise, play often, but I would also recommend that you pick up some heavy stuff (lift weights).
Your stew sounds legit. Eat all you want. When we eat right, our body works right, and we can trust all those biochemical signals that tell us when we are hungry and when we have had enough.
Thanks JasonS, I have a 3 year old daughter who’s heavy enough for daily pick ups
. I’ll be sure to add some weight to my daily routine. And the stew was legit!
Hey guys!
This is not related (necessarily) to this post, but I figured this was as good as any to ask. Do you have any recommended daily Vitamins to take (brand, for women, etc.)? Or do you recommend not taking them daily at all? I would also love if they didn’t break my bank. So many Vitamins these days are super expensive.
You shouldn’t really need a daily vitamin if your diet is right. That said, if your diet is still a little rough around the edges you may be misusing the vitamins you eat and a multi wouldn’t hurt. I recommend that all my clients take vit D, magnesium, and a couple grams of fish oil.
I’m having trouble. I work at a grocery store (Trader Joe’s) and people think it’s a great and healthy grocery store (we do have some healthy things) but most of the things we open for people to try aren’t healthy or paleo! I just can’t seem to help myself to try these tasty treats. I also need to find a way to keep my energy up while I’m on the floor, I can’t just walk away from what I’m doing to grab something especially if I’m on a register for hours at a time. If I’m at home or any where else I’m ok. Any suggestions or help? I just started trying to keep a food journal. HELP!
Hi Steph,
Trader Joes has some great paleo options. As I live in a home with 5 other people who are not paleo , I have 3 suggestions for you:
The first and most important is to make a commitment to stay paleo for a length of time, either 30 days like Robb Wolf says, or even just for one day (in the morning when I wake up I make a commitment to myself to be paleo for that one day). Once I make a commitment to myself for my health, it is easier to say no to those treats at the checkout stand.
Suggestion number 2 is to have plenty of paleo snacks around to eat when you can. If I have emergency protein available like grilled, chicken breast strips, tuna salad, hard boiled eggs, or raw almonds, I am less likely to cheat.
Finally, #3 is to make sure you eat enough protein before you start your shift and on your break. And once you have been paleo for a few days, you tend to not crave the sweet stuff as much and it will be easier to say no.
Good luck, and maybe I will see you in line at TJs!
Trader Joe’s carries buffalo jerky! Why not tear into that when you feel like you’ll go insane without eating those darn veggie chips? It’s got a bit too much salt, but it’s really not too bad when you consider what else it’s made of. I feel your pain; Joe’s has some yummy crap!
We’ve been on paleo for about 8 weeks and my dear husband has lost 20 or more pounds and feels goooood! He looks so much better in his face too. We walk our dogs for 30-40 minutes a day and lift heavy things at the gym three times a week plus the usual home and garden maintenance. He is fine. I didn’t need to lose weight and I’ve lost about 4 pounds. I am so full after eating. Any ideas? I cannot afford to lose another pound. I have lovely muscles – all that protein really paid off and my energy level is good. I have gotten very strong of late – so cool.
Thanks
If your muscle mass is good, losing more fat probably isn’t a problem. If you feel like you are getting too lean you can always increase your intake of starchier carbs like sweet potatoes, yams, and butternut squash. And of course, keep your fat intake up, but make sure your fat sources are good quality, like grass fed beef, avocado, and coconut oil.
Is it considered cheating if I put some coconut creamer in my coffee?
Coconut milk, no. Sweetened or artificially sweetened coconut creamer, yes.
Sarah I just love your posts I started living a Paleo lifestyle two months ago and have lost 20 pounds. Now I am going to kick into gear some exercise – I bought your book – love the receipts… My 21 year old just got a job at a Mongollin grill and I get to pick what foods I want in dish – I told him he needs to creat a Paleo combo for the customers that come in … reminds me of your old son …
Thanks so much for the website. My boyfriend and I are a month into the diet and I am down 9 lbs and a full pants size. I have combined workouts with the diet and have found this the easiest way to lose weight in years – due the fact that we CAN eat. We truly appreciate the website for offering recipes that can add flavor to our meals. The lack of salt has been the hardest part thusfar and we are looking forward to adding variety to our meals.
I’m a shift worker ( paramedic ) and I’m having trouble with finding the beat meals while on shift. 99% of the time I am unable to get to a microwave to heat a meal.
Any suggestions on some meals I can eat that don’t require a microwave. I need enough meals to last almost 12 hour shifts.
Thanks
If you have an ice chest you can pack chicken salads, avocados, hard boiled eggs, lettuce wraps, deli meat, veggies, fruit, trail mix, tuna salad, strips of leftover steak, pork, or chicken.
When is it cheating vs. choosing to, as Robb would say, “kick your heels up once in awhile.”? I’m new to paleo and used to think of my diet as pretty good- no stranger to grass fed meats, organic local produce and other nutrient dense foods. However, I did (& do) have a huge sweet tooth that was becoming more of a thorn in my side. Also, I am the daughter of a Celiac, and though I wasn’t showing any obvious signs of a gluten intolerance, I had decided months ago to begin going gluten-free prophylatically. So when I read Robb’s book, I went paleo the next day. I knew my sugar cravings were an early sign of metabolic derangement, as was the little bit of fat I was beginning to store at my waist. With paleo, I was hoping to nip both in the bud. I did well initially, losing almost 6 pounds in two weeks. Then I had a cheat. Weight started going back up despite getting back to paleo. Two weeks later, I feel like I’m still recovering from that cheat. Obviously, my metabolism is not healed sufficiently to be able to handle even minor deviations, so in my case, everything is a cheat. But will there come a time when I can “kick my heels up” and not have to start over from square 1 the next day? How will I know when that day comes? Also, I started Crossfit 3 weeks ago. I only workout this way 3 times a week, but I do have a stressful job. How do I know when exercise is being counterproductive and is itself the reason “why isn’t this working?”
Does the Paleo diet work for people who take a large fose of anti-depressants? I seem to have trouble losing weight on many diets because of the anti-depressant medication that I take. What is your take on this matter?
Great article. I do so well for a few days then I cheat. I am happy to see I am not the only one battling this delima.
This is an awesome site. I’ve been on it for two days and already feel better. My question is this: I train for Ironmans. I don’t think that’s in the recommended exercise but I’m not sure. Is it possible to get enough calories in on paleo when some days I burn in excess of 5000. Also, do you know of any paleo drink substitutes for Gatorade? I know it’s all sugar but that’s what I’m fueled on during long workouts and races. Otherwise, outside of working out, I’m trying to follow the rules. Any suggestions?
Thanks, Claire
I hear coconut water is a good sub for gatorade.
Whole Foods has a great product that I drink after workouts…Coconut Water and Lime. It has lots of potassium and electrolytes from the coconut, and the lime makes it super refreshing.
Great post. I was one of those “in denial” people. I went paleo a year ago, but I cheated all the time – sugar in coffee, lots of takeout, store-bought condiments, rice, potatoes, alcohol, not exercising or sleeping enough… I was at a healthy weight, but I felt I still had lots of bodyfat to lose. So at the end of June this year I was honest with myself and got back on the right track. Since then I’ve had no sugars, starches, grains, dairy, or alcohol, none at all. I haven’t eaten out. I’m eating nothing except organic veggies, pastured meat and eggs, wild fish, and some organic fruit. I’ve had a dozen macadamias maybe twice, no other nuts or seeds. Plenty of good fats: coconut oil for cooking, olive or walnut oil for salads. Coconut milk in coffee sometimes, though most times I drink it black, and I’ve cut down my intake from approximately 4-5 cups a day to 2, sometimes 1. Apart from that, I only drink water. I don’t have mints or gum or diet soda or other stuff like that, EVER. I’ve been taking a multivitamin and cod liver oil every day. I’ve been exercising like clockwork three times a week doing HIITs and getting at least 8-9 hrs of sleep a night.
Well, you probably saw this coming but… Yep, it’s still not working. I read your other posts that said many people have too high expectations for their bodies, but I don’t feel it’s the case with me… I know my body’s limits, I know I’ll never be a supermodel, and I’m not too hard on myself – I wear a size 12, have granny arms despite constant weight lifting, and I’m only 35. It’s embarrassing and depressing… Not to mention, a great reason for anti-paleo people to say things like, “no wonder you can’t lose weight, look at all that fat and meat you’re eating!”
I know paleo is the way to go because physically I feel amazing on it. I just want to feel amazing emotionally, too. I want to get into a bikini without feeling the burning need to cover my 40″, cellulite-ridden hips… What’s your take on my situation? Am I still doing something wrong?
Anna, I am dealing with this same dilemma. Look at the previous post called “you cant fix a body you hate” and my reply to it. Good Luck!
This post is exactly what I needed to read! I have been lackadaisically following Paleo for about a month now, and while I don’t regularly weigh myself, I know that I haven’t lost any significant weight and now I can’t lie to myself anymore as to why. Sometimes you just need a good, swift kick in the behind to get you going and this post is just what the doctor ordered. Thank you!!
Sarah,
Love the site!
I’ve been doing a modified Paleo diet (very strict during the week and bad on the weekends) for over a year. I mainly eat to fuel so many of my meals were simple, but very healthy. Lots of lean, lean meats and veggies with a little bit of fat here and there (until the weekend).
Now, I am on strict Paleo (have one cheat day a week), but started using your site because my meals were getting super boring.
Since making your recipes, my pants have become a little tighter. My question for you is, am I going to gain some weight at first due to the increase in animal fats and oils that you call for in your recipes? For example, I made the Sun Dried Tomato Chicken and Brussel Sprouts with Bacon last night for dinner and the “Fun Burger” the night before. I NEVER eat bacon, and the first recipe called for all the olive oil that was in the jar of tomatoes. I would typically never use that much oil. The meals just seemed heavier than I am use to.
However, it was much tastier, but I just want to make sure that I am doing this right because again, I am use to the same old Chicken and Veggies for dinner and Eggwhites and Spinach for breakfast…
Any advice would be appreciated! Thanks!